How has your experience been with doctors when it comes to menopause?
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Lynn
Now 48 for years I have been going to my GP with a range of symptoms including palpitations and chest pain, low energy and fatigue, anxiety and depression and I knew it was related to my hormones as I haven’t had regular periods for years. No one mention peri menopause. I found out about it by googling symptoms. I then mentioned it to GPS and even female GPS shrugged it off. It was only due to Covid that my practice put econsult on their website. I described my symptoms and asked for HRT or to speak to an expert in hormones. A GP called me and without any debate agreed to put me on HRT. Why? Because she had started it herself. Are GPS taught about perimenopause? I’ve been treated like I am just depressed for so long without any consideration being given to my other symptoms. Constantly being told it’s anxiety and depression makes you feel like you’re going mad.
Same for me for years I was told it was anxiety and stress till I finally found a good female doctor that checked my hormone levels. Everyone else was like your too young to be on peri menopause abs never bothered to check. So here I am, glad I found this app.
No, doctors are not taught about menopause. I know mostly about the U.S., but the UK sounds similar. This is how it was explained to me by doctors…
Many Med Schools do not even offer courses in mid-life care. If the university does have these courses, they are not required, but elective, for all doctors – include your gynecologist! Can you believe that?! The doctor explaining this to me went on to say that young doctors today are not interested in this area of study because delivering babies pays much better.
I started menopause at 45. My GP said I was too young. They know very little. She sent me to a Gynecologist who tried to put me on the pill. Regulate your period pills. No way! Why? It took me 2 more tries to find a D.O. who knew what to do. She had German medical credentials.
Val
Terrible!
I am perimenopausal and have experienced non-stop heavy virginal bleeding for 6 months. I was prescribed iron, Cerazette, Tranexamic acid & Mefenamic acid and every time I went back to say it wasn’t working I was told to keep taking the tablets. I was having regular migraines in line with my old period cycle, hot flushes followed by becoming freezing cold. I kept losing my words and train of thought. I stopped going out as I never knew when the next flood and leakage was going to happen. I became anxious about going to work, taking spare clothes with me when ever I went anywhere. After going to the doctors regularly for 4 months feeling increasingly powerless, tired and frustrated I finally took myself to A&E. Suddenly everything swung into action. I prescribed Norethisterone & was seen by a consultant later that week, had an internal scan & a mirena coil was fitted. I am still on Norethisterone as I’ve been told it can take 6 months to stop the bleeding. The other symptoms are still ongoing but at least I feel more in control.
Every women goes through the menopause. Why doesn’t every surgery have a GP that specialises in it?
Hi Val previously I have also been prescribed all your medication for heavy constant bleeding, after 2 years without any success I had a consult with a very kind consultant who scolded me for not seeking help earlier! I had a hysterectomy and it changed my life, although ovaries intact I’m in full swing menopause now with good and v bad days, the support is out there but you need to be assertive and push for it!
I am going through exactly the same experience. I thought I was going mad and feel like my doctors don’t believe me. I had the mirena coil fitted in January and it made my already extremely heavy periods worse, so be prepared. I had to take time off work and lost so much blood that my iron levels were dangerously depleted and I was so ill. Couldn’t get up in the mornings and slept most of the day. Simple tasks like walking up stairs or putting out the washing completely drained me. I would be huffing and puffing like I’d run a marathon. The saving grace is that You are already on the medications I was prescribed after my illness so hopefully your symptoms will be more controlled. My last period was quite light but I had to wait the full six months before they calmed down. I’ve also put on a stone in weight which is a side affect they don’t advertise with the merina coil but the same thing happened to my daughter. Having said that it’s better than going through the monthly horror of my period. I wish you all the luck sweetie. Just remember it does get better and you are not alone.
After 3 months of straight bleeding I was given Portia bc pills and my bleeding stopped within 3 weeks. I had 1 brief period in 4 months after and then the long-term bleeding started again and went on for another 3 months. At that time I had moved across country, didn’t have a doctor set up and was dealing with a death in the family. I’ve finally gotten a new GYN and I’ll be having a mirena fitted this week. My new doc thought that the Portia pills were an odd choice of my original doctoe to prescribe.
For the Mirena, Is the weight gain a real thing? I’ve just worked off the first 10lbs of a 40lb weight-loss goal and do not want to go backwards! This new doc did not mention weight gain and the internet says it can vary.
Belle
Seems not many want to invest time to discuss. They recommend trying something from a big box store and walk out of the room.
I have been my best support for information and comfort so far!
Same for me. I had abrupt severe vaginal hemorrhaging and I was put through a bunch of expensive, often painful tests only to have nothing be found wrong in any of them. I then did research and came up with the possibility of early onset perimenopause on my own and my doctor didn’t believe me. It wasn’t until I read the discussion boards in this app, 9 years later, that I found out she could have done a simple blood test to see whether my idea was right.
Warty
The first time I went after having night sweats (11-12 times) I was so exhausted! I’d tolerated this for years because the GP I saw told me to take my temperature when I woke up…..totally meaningless advice. I went home feeling I was wasting his time. It took me a few years to attempt again – I saw a woman of similar age and as I was armed with some knowledge from the Menopause Matters website, I wa prescribed at my request HRT. I’ve never looked back! I’m sorry to sound sexist, but there are just not enough women involved in helping menopausal women. My last gynecologist was a young man in his early 30s talking the textbook speak – not a clue about menopause and it’s symptoms.
I absolutely agree with you! My last OB/GYN was in her mid-30s. Now I’ve learned to ask for a doctor that is female, has children, and has gone through menopause. Otherwise they just don’t get it. A waste of both of our time.
My best resource has been me. I’ve read several books and demand certain lab work be done.
CK
So far not good. I saw a female OBGYN and was basically told that “it can’t be perimenopause because I haven’t missed any periods.” Didn’t care that I’ve gone from regular to irregular (26-39 days), hot flashes, night sweats, weight gain, anxiety and mood changes… no tests or anything. I also think my age (41) was a factor for not listening to me. It was very disappointing. Currently doing my own tests and researching herbs and supplements.
Deb UK
Im unable to take HRT due to previously having breast cancer (I’ve just turned 50). When I asked my female GP what my options were I was told “very little”. I’ve do far been using trial and error herbal remedies.
Same here. When I asked in the breast unit what help there was to manage peri menopause, I was told there was none. Just had to get on with it. Back and forth to GP with repeated UTI and thrush and now have a range of creams and gels (non hormonal) which help. I’ve always been told to avoid herbal supplements in case they interfere with tamoxifen.
Same for me as well. I was told “you’ll need to lower your expectations for life going forward”. I’m sorry to hear the same for you and others. I have also been going the trial and error path with herbal remedies- this is really f-ing hard!!
Magda
Not one doc mentioned peri-menopause or menopause to me. My therapist and my own research brought me to understand where I am. We’ve always been told about menopause – periods stop and hot flashes and that’s it. But perimenopause lasts years and many women suffer to the point of real mental health crises – yet no one says a word.
Amen! I have learned so much since I found this app!! Thank you!
Scout
Neither my GYN or my Internist suggested any symptoms over past 8 months could be menopause. MRI, Ultrasounds, CT, memory tests. They suggested anxiety meds for me. I figured it out..ask them and they both said wow, yeah, makes sense. Tested me and Voila.
Cat
Just said they couldn’t & wouldn’t prescribe any form of HRT (unsuitable due to other health conditions) and only Clonidine was available to me, which was useless. That was it. No other support other than a printout & Menopause Matters website
I’ve been prescribed clonidine too !
It’s day three.. I have cotton mouth so bad ?. I’ve noticed a reduction in the amount of hot flashes, but they’re still there. Going to give it at least a wk and see if it helps or not.
Elaine
My nurse practitioner is my go to person. The Dr laughed at me.
Unacceptable for your MD. Compassion goes a long way. I’m guessing your doctor is a male.
HN
Since I had a hysterectomy after my last child was born, I had no periods anyway. So my tracking of other symptoms was largely ignored and I was blown off.
Sandy
I started having night sweats last year and I got no counseling or advice from my doctor. She did not offer me any options for hormone replacement, didn’t talk to me about any help, just said, “yep, most women go through menopause”. And that was it. Now I’m having hot flashes as well. My sleep is so disrupted by the hot flashes and night sweats, I’m exhausted.
I’ve had a very similar experience. I change doctors until I am happy with somebody that has more knowledge of menopause. It is miserable to go through life exhausted.
Caz
Took two years of itchiness, fatigue, migraines, mood swings weight gain, hair loss, no libido and irregular periods before getting to see a female doctor and being diagnosed. I was 41 when it all started
val
well past menopause lady doctors whete fine helped was on hrt 8
yrs ago but found lump in breast came off it its lack of libido dryness experiencing bladder issues prolapse of both vagina & bowel waiting 2 yrs to get op everything on hold with covid got to have all tests inserted ring the help as bladder cut in half getting infection all time . Local gp put me on pessary insert in vagina x2 week oestrogen helped slightly but pressure in groin left hip can barely walk . No appts at gps was seen in walk in centre by nurse who prescribed antibiotics for kidney infection .stuck in limbo all appoints 5 of them been cancelled
Julie
My gp doesn’t recommend it, there’s no history of cancer in my family either but he’s very reluctant to give me it. My joints are aching I have days where I’m limping so he’s referred me to a physio therapist. I’ve even booked myself in to see a chiropractor as I’m sure my body is out of alignment. My friend is on HRT and swears by it but her gp is a woman and is probably experiencing it herself. I said that I want to go on it, but I’ll try this first and see how it goes. I’m on anti depressants for the mood swings which has helped immensely, started feeling normal again emotionally, I can cope with the hot flushes but the joint pain is now exceeding everything, can’t sleep as I can’t get comfortable and my job involves walking miles everyday it’s painful. I just don’t think my doctor understands!
Stacey
I’m 41, Been riding the “peri menopause train” for a few years now. I’ve had all kinds of symptoms and questions. Yes, I’m overweight (so it doesn’t help, but I’m trying to rectify that. ) with that being said, when I mentioned my peri menopause to my 1st gyno she believed me and wanted to put me on the pellet therapy (did my research…still too new for me to say yes) she told me there was nothing else I could do since I said no to the pellet therapy. Went to 2nd Gyno she told I was being silly, she didn’t know what I or my 1st gyno was even talking about and said it was due to me being “grossly overweight.” (Mind you since my symptoms started my weight fluctuates between 193 & 210 and I’m 5’4) after telling her she was no “Pamela Anderson” herself I went to see my 3rd gyno. She listens, doesn’t make me feel crazy. she tries to help me but I’m still not getting what I think I need.
Badtemper
I spoke with 2 GP’s both female, who didn’t want to put me on HRT, they wanted to give me anti depressants! I requested HRT to help with symptoms…was just given what was available due to national shortages!! Initially I was put on Femostan (mylan) but near the end of each packet cycle, my symptoms have became so bad, I can hardly control myself, feel like I’m going mad, cry at almost everything, hot flushes, insomnia, want to hide, anxiety, leave my husband, no sexual appetite, brain fog, angry, I don’t trust the decisions i’m making etc etc On top of that, it all occurs around my period and the moon being either new or full, maybe I am therefore mad!!!
I have contacted my GP again, as feel I needed help, requested trying another
HRT, wanted me again to have antidepressants, but have declined and just started Evorel Sequi patches – time will tell if they help, though I am now thinking maybe I should have antidepressants because of how sad and negative I am. My facial muscles have forgotten how to smile…
What bothers me is a 10 minute consultation is all it takes to define if patients should be given HRT or antidepressants and a national shortage then means you even if it’s HRT it’s just what’s left on the shelf….
I find it hard to ask for help but I’m shouting for help now, anybody listening…
I hear you and can relate. I just discovered all this today and am appalled that my docs never thought about peri menopause when I went to them with my anxiety and panic attacks that just suddenly started on the job in November, at age 49.
I will be contacting my GYN soon to see if she can test me and offer suggestions for help. I have not heard of the medications you mentioned, but definitely think you should keep trying other remedies or find a new doc.
Hang in there-give yourself grace each day-acknowledge what you are feeling as being valid. I have discovered that the sudden onset of anxiety, extreme sadness and emotional outbursts, negative hatred towards the injustices of the world…all hit hard and they are very real to me, but not everyone else understands-including those closest to me. I have been trying to remind myself that I am not going crazy.
Warty
My Nurse practitioner wanted to give me antidepressants which are not proven to help night sweats. I referred to the NICE guidelines. I asked to see the GP and mentioned this. He got very offhand and said what do you want from us. Next I get a call and sudden suggestion to resume HRT. I am appalled how many women are treated so poorly in this day and age for a very common condition. It’s the lack of knowledge that makes me annoyed and the easy option of prescribing medication that is not appropriate. Lazy healthcare service in my opinion.
JB
Unsympathetic as I had not reached 12 months without a period
Trace
After 2wks of playing phone tag w my doc, I finally spoke w him Monday and he prescribed me clonidine. It’s only day 3 and I’ve only noticed a reduction in the amount of hot flashes (I was having 30-40 a day ??) , but they’re not completely gone.
I’m going to give it a wk n see if it works or not
Clare
I spoke to a doctor to discuss if I was in peri menopause and to ask about headaches. He looked bored as if to say, just get on with it for god’s sake.
Cm
I have had to go back on HRT as I couldn’t cope daily life and work after stopping HRT. Doctor would not prescribe- sent me to hospital, got checked, then after 3 months had a lump under my arm not related. hospital dr wrote to gp advising to stop. then I had to call and explain. she wrote another letter to GP who doesn’t really know me well. would not even allow me to book telephone call to talk and explain.
Nette
I was in my late 30s but the doctors keeps telling me it to early
It’s so sad to think dr does not realize it can start earlier for some people, we are all so unique ?
Julia
Extremely unhelpful and didn’t think it was a big deal… just grin and bear it, it won’t last forever!
Jean
Just fob you off especially when you have more than one symptom
Marcia
Doctor doesn’t really care much. Even when I explain how I felt during my menopause, all they’re saying is have red clover. I have bad hot flushes, foggy head, anxiety attacks. And many more symptoms. I’m just giving up going to doctor cuz they don’t care a bit.
I can understand your frustrations, you are not alone,, try not to stress ,, just know there are people who care??
Julie
Mostly adequate but I did my research before going to them so that really helped as I didn’t want to be fobbed off
Nini
I’m a POF case that started at age 14. I’m now 39, having been in postmenopause for 24 years. Doctors barely know how to treat normal cases as it is. I had one of the best menopause doctors in the US for years and she didn’t know what to do with me. I’ve lost all hope.
Katherine
My doctor makes me feel like I lab rat , lack of sympathy,, unnecessary tests, very disappointed, gave me estrogen made from hoses urine ( Premarin) .
Premarin is useless. Demand bio identical hormones. Change doctors if you need to. Be armed with knowledge. There are several good books that I have come across that make me feel I am not alone in experiencing all the perimenopausal symptoms and enduring useless advice from doctors.
BB-C
2 years ago at 45, my gyno told me I was too young to be peri. 1 year ago she told me anxiety wasn’t a symptom. This year, after a trip to the ER, she now says I’m peri ONLY because of my age. I’m now going to an endocrinologist for testing and to help manage all my symptoms.
Katherine
My experience has been terrible you tell them your symptoms and then they just set you up for unnecessary invasive tests.. cystoscopy, stress tests , and medication with no explanation. I am 52 And I have had no bone density test done or blood work done to see where my vitamin and hormone levels are… frustrated with the lack of support and compassion. ?
Paula
Female GP’s being very reluctant to prescribe HRT despite symptoms of peri-menopause
Missie’s
My doctor did hormone tests and swears there is nothing wrong. I live with this every day and I know something is not right.
I wish doctors would listen to us and understand when we say we know something is different about our bodies and we have concerns and worries and we need support. Not just be dismissed as a head case.
SpiritAnimal808
Been for numerous blood test appointments because I feel menopausal symptoms. Spookily enough I’m not menopausal because my bloods come back normal EVERY time! ?
Jane
My experience of doctors has been universally appalling. I’m 49 and each doctor has diminished or trivialised every symptom. I saw a doctor this week who is the surgery hormone quack. She will prescribe but not advise. So, if you know what you want she will write a script for you – but no advice, no reassurance, nothing. Actually quite sinister in a way. The experience was very much ‘at your own risk’
Jannine
Just completely dismissed my symptoms
Said you’re too young- this was a female doc
Kerry
Hi everyone- brand new here, and SO glad I’ve downloaded the app. I’ve been reading and reading… and can actually feel my breathing slow as I do!!! I’m not alone…!! How wonderful this feels.
I suffer diagnosed C-PTSD which has been exacerbated by this whole menopause lark… and recently immigrated, too. All been a bit stressful…
Three months ago I finally saw a doctor here… and his response to my trying to explain how I feel? “I hope you’re not going to be a difficult patient?!.. I don’t do mental”
I was floored!!!
Still haven’t come back from that… can’t believe a doctor would go that far. I’m reluctant to even try and find another doc.. on top of trying to deal with finding my feet in a new country and dealing with seismic anxiety and memo, I just don’t have the energy to go through the motions of sifting through doctors to find one who actually cares…
I can’t get over this! How utterly rude and unprofessional! I would consider reporting this individual to their professional licensing board. So sorry to hear you were treated that way, along with everybody else writing on this board.
Rachel
Good or not good is too binary of an answer. What if a doctor is good on some things and not others
Veronica
I was 45 when I started having peri menopausal symptoms. My GP said I was too young to be going through this change and suggested antidepressants. I took them for 12 months with no improvement. After around 18 months I decided to go back and speak to another GP who was sympathetic. After I had a good chat with her and told her all of my many symptoms, she agreed. It took a few months of reading and research but I finally decided to take HRT. It is helping me in some ways. The plus side is that I’ve had no side effects/adverse reactions using them. I’m now nearly 50 snd still on the patches.
KateHw
I heard that GPS get half a day training on menopause (or maybe that’s used to)?
Olga
Three years ago I was diagnosed with GERD and a sliding HH, soon after I’m told I’m in perimenopausal I changed my diet but fell off the wagon, this year I’m told I now have gastritis! I’m my own Dr now, I’m starting to think my gut issues are due to perimeno but NOT ONE dr has given me any clue or educate me on it, and I’ve spent lots of it already! I’m so pissed!!!! All the Google searching drives me crazy!!
Eliza
I got lucky and was referred by another woman to NP Deborah Nicholas at Kaiser Permanente in Richmond, CA. She seriously saved me! I was recently widowed and had spent the past year + dealing with my late spouse’s caregiving – he died at 51 from prostate cancer and was paralyzed the last 6 months of his life.
Nikki
As early as 36 my journey began. Because of how I look they would my book without peeking inside!! Since then, many cities our family has lived and they are all the same. Making insensitive hurtful statements such as “I shouldn’t be too concerned because I Look good” or “People are having surgery to look like this” although I battle depression. Endometriosis, dermoid cyst. Mental breakdown in front their very eyes. It has really traumatized me, lack of giving knowledge on their part and The dismay for me that I am as Knowledgeable as I am about this and about myself and My Body! Be Your Biggest Advocate! Sending Love and Light to you All
JDJ
I spoke with my GP over the phone but I wanted a face to face he just wanted to put me on anti depressants without even seeing me, which I refused. I finally got a face to face appointment where he prescribed patches. When I started taking my second pack I got severe pain in my breasts. They took me off this an prescribed gel pump pack, (one pump and two tabs at night for 12/28days. This didn’t work so they increased the pump dosage and was told as I’m refusing anti depressants I may have to put up with night sweats/hot flushes or painful breasts. Not really ideal to have either tbh
Fiona
I’m fearing being fobbed off when I call them. All of a sudden I’ve got heavy legs that are painful as well as joints & muscle tension & the weight is piling on making the symptoms worse. My legs feel so lethargic. Any pointers when I call them? Thanks
Terri
I can talk to my gynecologist and primary care doctor
Krissymarie
Doctors I’ve dealt with including the obgyn dr who delivered my daughter and did my tubial ligation surgery and found the non cancerous cells on my cervix won’t really do anything to find out why after my surgery and hormones replacement therapy when I was trying to transition and had to stop taking testosterone after I got a cyst on my ovaries and they claimed it was caused by the testosterone injections but I had really high estrogen levels which was taken by the doctor doing the hrt for me so she tested my hormones levels my regular doctor should test my hormone levels for himself I’ve been dealing with menopause symptoms since I was 24 years old after my tubes were tied and before that I was having extremely heavy and painful periods the surgery was supposed to help what they claimed was just a painful period
Eri
I mentioned it to my GP, who is an older man, an older married man, mind you, and he brushed it off. He started talking about his wife’s hot flashes. Hot flashes are not the only symptom. Perimenopause apparently has many symptoms. I just happen to have panic attacks around the time of my period some months and they have been bad this month. Some months I just don’t feel right, or I cry for no reason. Those times though, I’m able to remind myself that it’s almost time for my period and I’ll be ok in a few days. Panic attacks can be persistent though. My doctor just wanted to throw a pill at me and send me on my way. That’s all any of them do. He did do an EKG on me though to reassure me that my heart was fine. I need to find an older female gynecologist. Maybe she’ll take me seriously and check my hormones. My primary doctor wouldn’t do it, saying the blood tests for hormones can be “tricky”.
Krista
I’m 55 years old and still in regular periods. My PCP still asks if I get regular periods and my answer has been yes every time. Everybody I know has already been through menopause.
Thanks to this app I at least know what to expect and what can help.
Talia
My doctor is 10 years younger than me. She really doesn’t know how to help me other than prescribe anti depressants. It’s like menopause is not covered in medical school.
Sue
Doesn’t listen at all
LLuLLu
Horrible Experience!
I tried explaining what I have been experiencing and was told (before I even finished speaking) “get a fan if you feel hot.” I tried explaining the heart palpitations, extreme brain fog and confusion moments, and really bad anxiety and moments of sadness/depression (I’ve never had in my entire life) and was told maybe I need a psychiatrist and they walked out of the room! I went to this doc because she was a woman! And this was my experience!
ADHD Clover
I’ve had a diagnosis of ADHD for over 20 years. I’m now 44. Two years ago I felt like my brain was breaking — I couldn’t find the right words for concepts/things and I felt like my cognition was declining. I took a neuropsychological test that showed my cognition hadn’t, in fact, changed since my last exam 10 years prior, but the neurologist never mentioned how hormonal changes could affect ADHD symptoms! I am very disappointed in the lack of patient education regarding how hormonal changes affect women, in general, but specifically regarding how they affect ADHD brains. Do the doctors just not know? And all my care has taken place in Boston, which has excellent medical care!
LK
My symptoms have continued to be disregarded by my GYN. After asking a third time for absolutely ANY solution to help make sex less painful and navigate the depression and overwhelming various symptoms that I experienced, I was told “you’ll need to lower your expectations for life going forward”. It is absolutely unbelievable to me that 1. A Dr would respond that way 2. When a symptom is depression, the answer is to basically say “yep, no hope. It will only get worse”. It is heartbreaking. I have researched endlessly and have found several different approaches that work for me. It is a lot to take on, it is lonely, it is depressing, overwhelming. Trying to maintain my same performance levels at work is difficult with brain fog and memory lapses. I truly hope that this becomes more mainstream, communicated, and supported.
I will say: for anyone struggling with sex, I discovered an absolute miracle that has worked for me. It is expensive and I know many may not be able or willing to spend $400+, but the feeling of finally making positive progress and feeling like a partner again is worth every penny. The device is Joylux for anyone also looking for an avenue to try.
I hope everyone here feels supported and has hope- to stumble into this and feel so in the dark for something that affects half of the population is truly so shocking to me.
Lizz
I had to go see a menopause specialist
Kimberly
I went to my General Dr about my drastic weight loss, pains, and my period issues. Each time I left disappointed, until my friend told me to go to my OB. My own General Dr did not refer me to my OB. When i asked my General if it was Perimenopause she said no, that Periods usually grow less not more. I started my cycle using small tampons, I ended it using Super ( I didn’t even know Super existed). And my Dr has the audacity to tell me it is not Menopause related!!!! Oh yea, plus i have Fibros!
Janq
I have had so many doctors who fight me on what I want. How do I find a doctor who will prescribe topical HRT cream and accept my Blue California insurance? My PPO doctor says she can’t prescribe compound cream HRT but I am allergic to whatever is in the estrogen patch.
Kimberly
Taking any and all suggestions. Between the cold air for my hot flashes, the cold air is doing a number on my bones. Is there anything I can do?
Now 48 for years I have been going to my GP with a range of symptoms including palpitations and chest pain, low energy and fatigue, anxiety and depression and I knew it was related to my hormones as I haven’t had regular periods for years. No one mention peri menopause. I found out about it by googling symptoms. I then mentioned it to GPS and even female GPS shrugged it off. It was only due to Covid that my practice put econsult on their website. I described my symptoms and asked for HRT or to speak to an expert in hormones. A GP called me and without any debate agreed to put me on HRT. Why? Because she had started it herself. Are GPS taught about perimenopause? I’ve been treated like I am just depressed for so long without any consideration being given to my other symptoms. Constantly being told it’s anxiety and depression makes you feel like you’re going mad.
Same for me for years I was told it was anxiety and stress till I finally found a good female doctor that checked my hormone levels. Everyone else was like your too young to be on peri menopause abs never bothered to check. So here I am, glad I found this app.
No, doctors are not taught about menopause. I know mostly about the U.S., but the UK sounds similar. This is how it was explained to me by doctors…
Many Med Schools do not even offer courses in mid-life care. If the university does have these courses, they are not required, but elective, for all doctors – include your gynecologist! Can you believe that?! The doctor explaining this to me went on to say that young doctors today are not interested in this area of study because delivering babies pays much better.
I started menopause at 45. My GP said I was too young. They know very little. She sent me to a Gynecologist who tried to put me on the pill. Regulate your period pills. No way! Why? It took me 2 more tries to find a D.O. who knew what to do. She had German medical credentials.
Terrible!
I am perimenopausal and have experienced non-stop heavy virginal bleeding for 6 months. I was prescribed iron, Cerazette, Tranexamic acid & Mefenamic acid and every time I went back to say it wasn’t working I was told to keep taking the tablets. I was having regular migraines in line with my old period cycle, hot flushes followed by becoming freezing cold. I kept losing my words and train of thought. I stopped going out as I never knew when the next flood and leakage was going to happen. I became anxious about going to work, taking spare clothes with me when ever I went anywhere. After going to the doctors regularly for 4 months feeling increasingly powerless, tired and frustrated I finally took myself to A&E. Suddenly everything swung into action. I prescribed Norethisterone & was seen by a consultant later that week, had an internal scan & a mirena coil was fitted. I am still on Norethisterone as I’ve been told it can take 6 months to stop the bleeding. The other symptoms are still ongoing but at least I feel more in control.
Every women goes through the menopause. Why doesn’t every surgery have a GP that specialises in it?
Hi Val previously I have also been prescribed all your medication for heavy constant bleeding, after 2 years without any success I had a consult with a very kind consultant who scolded me for not seeking help earlier! I had a hysterectomy and it changed my life, although ovaries intact I’m in full swing menopause now with good and v bad days, the support is out there but you need to be assertive and push for it!
I am going through exactly the same experience. I thought I was going mad and feel like my doctors don’t believe me. I had the mirena coil fitted in January and it made my already extremely heavy periods worse, so be prepared. I had to take time off work and lost so much blood that my iron levels were dangerously depleted and I was so ill. Couldn’t get up in the mornings and slept most of the day. Simple tasks like walking up stairs or putting out the washing completely drained me. I would be huffing and puffing like I’d run a marathon. The saving grace is that You are already on the medications I was prescribed after my illness so hopefully your symptoms will be more controlled. My last period was quite light but I had to wait the full six months before they calmed down. I’ve also put on a stone in weight which is a side affect they don’t advertise with the merina coil but the same thing happened to my daughter. Having said that it’s better than going through the monthly horror of my period. I wish you all the luck sweetie. Just remember it does get better and you are not alone.
After 3 months of straight bleeding I was given Portia bc pills and my bleeding stopped within 3 weeks. I had 1 brief period in 4 months after and then the long-term bleeding started again and went on for another 3 months. At that time I had moved across country, didn’t have a doctor set up and was dealing with a death in the family. I’ve finally gotten a new GYN and I’ll be having a mirena fitted this week. My new doc thought that the Portia pills were an odd choice of my original doctoe to prescribe.
For the Mirena, Is the weight gain a real thing? I’ve just worked off the first 10lbs of a 40lb weight-loss goal and do not want to go backwards! This new doc did not mention weight gain and the internet says it can vary.
Seems not many want to invest time to discuss. They recommend trying something from a big box store and walk out of the room.
I have been my best support for information and comfort so far!
? we need to be our own advocates
My doc said “welcome to the club” and quickly changed the subject.
I was quite young when I started peri menopause so doctors didn’t believe me
Same for me. I had abrupt severe vaginal hemorrhaging and I was put through a bunch of expensive, often painful tests only to have nothing be found wrong in any of them. I then did research and came up with the possibility of early onset perimenopause on my own and my doctor didn’t believe me. It wasn’t until I read the discussion boards in this app, 9 years later, that I found out she could have done a simple blood test to see whether my idea was right.
The first time I went after having night sweats (11-12 times) I was so exhausted! I’d tolerated this for years because the GP I saw told me to take my temperature when I woke up…..totally meaningless advice. I went home feeling I was wasting his time. It took me a few years to attempt again – I saw a woman of similar age and as I was armed with some knowledge from the Menopause Matters website, I wa prescribed at my request HRT. I’ve never looked back! I’m sorry to sound sexist, but there are just not enough women involved in helping menopausal women. My last gynecologist was a young man in his early 30s talking the textbook speak – not a clue about menopause and it’s symptoms.
I absolutely agree with you! My last OB/GYN was in her mid-30s. Now I’ve learned to ask for a doctor that is female, has children, and has gone through menopause. Otherwise they just don’t get it. A waste of both of our time.
My best resource has been me. I’ve read several books and demand certain lab work be done.
So far not good. I saw a female OBGYN and was basically told that “it can’t be perimenopause because I haven’t missed any periods.” Didn’t care that I’ve gone from regular to irregular (26-39 days), hot flashes, night sweats, weight gain, anxiety and mood changes… no tests or anything. I also think my age (41) was a factor for not listening to me. It was very disappointing. Currently doing my own tests and researching herbs and supplements.
Im unable to take HRT due to previously having breast cancer (I’ve just turned 50). When I asked my female GP what my options were I was told “very little”. I’ve do far been using trial and error herbal remedies.
Same here. When I asked in the breast unit what help there was to manage peri menopause, I was told there was none. Just had to get on with it. Back and forth to GP with repeated UTI and thrush and now have a range of creams and gels (non hormonal) which help. I’ve always been told to avoid herbal supplements in case they interfere with tamoxifen.
Same for me as well. I was told “you’ll need to lower your expectations for life going forward”. I’m sorry to hear the same for you and others. I have also been going the trial and error path with herbal remedies- this is really f-ing hard!!
Not one doc mentioned peri-menopause or menopause to me. My therapist and my own research brought me to understand where I am. We’ve always been told about menopause – periods stop and hot flashes and that’s it. But perimenopause lasts years and many women suffer to the point of real mental health crises – yet no one says a word.
Amen! I have learned so much since I found this app!! Thank you!
Neither my GYN or my Internist suggested any symptoms over past 8 months could be menopause. MRI, Ultrasounds, CT, memory tests. They suggested anxiety meds for me. I figured it out..ask them and they both said wow, yeah, makes sense. Tested me and Voila.
Just said they couldn’t & wouldn’t prescribe any form of HRT (unsuitable due to other health conditions) and only Clonidine was available to me, which was useless. That was it. No other support other than a printout & Menopause Matters website
I’ve been prescribed clonidine too !
It’s day three.. I have cotton mouth so bad ?. I’ve noticed a reduction in the amount of hot flashes, but they’re still there. Going to give it at least a wk and see if it helps or not.
My nurse practitioner is my go to person. The Dr laughed at me.
Unacceptable for your MD. Compassion goes a long way. I’m guessing your doctor is a male.
Since I had a hysterectomy after my last child was born, I had no periods anyway. So my tracking of other symptoms was largely ignored and I was blown off.
I started having night sweats last year and I got no counseling or advice from my doctor. She did not offer me any options for hormone replacement, didn’t talk to me about any help, just said, “yep, most women go through menopause”. And that was it. Now I’m having hot flashes as well. My sleep is so disrupted by the hot flashes and night sweats, I’m exhausted.
I’ve had a very similar experience. I change doctors until I am happy with somebody that has more knowledge of menopause. It is miserable to go through life exhausted.
Took two years of itchiness, fatigue, migraines, mood swings weight gain, hair loss, no libido and irregular periods before getting to see a female doctor and being diagnosed. I was 41 when it all started
well past menopause lady doctors whete fine helped was on hrt 8
yrs ago but found lump in breast came off it its lack of libido dryness experiencing bladder issues prolapse of both vagina & bowel waiting 2 yrs to get op everything on hold with covid got to have all tests inserted ring the help as bladder cut in half getting infection all time . Local gp put me on pessary insert in vagina x2 week oestrogen helped slightly but pressure in groin left hip can barely walk . No appts at gps was seen in walk in centre by nurse who prescribed antibiotics for kidney infection .stuck in limbo all appoints 5 of them been cancelled
My gp doesn’t recommend it, there’s no history of cancer in my family either but he’s very reluctant to give me it. My joints are aching I have days where I’m limping so he’s referred me to a physio therapist. I’ve even booked myself in to see a chiropractor as I’m sure my body is out of alignment. My friend is on HRT and swears by it but her gp is a woman and is probably experiencing it herself. I said that I want to go on it, but I’ll try this first and see how it goes. I’m on anti depressants for the mood swings which has helped immensely, started feeling normal again emotionally, I can cope with the hot flushes but the joint pain is now exceeding everything, can’t sleep as I can’t get comfortable and my job involves walking miles everyday it’s painful. I just don’t think my doctor understands!
I’m 41, Been riding the “peri menopause train” for a few years now. I’ve had all kinds of symptoms and questions. Yes, I’m overweight (so it doesn’t help, but I’m trying to rectify that. ) with that being said, when I mentioned my peri menopause to my 1st gyno she believed me and wanted to put me on the pellet therapy (did my research…still too new for me to say yes) she told me there was nothing else I could do since I said no to the pellet therapy. Went to 2nd Gyno she told I was being silly, she didn’t know what I or my 1st gyno was even talking about and said it was due to me being “grossly overweight.” (Mind you since my symptoms started my weight fluctuates between 193 & 210 and I’m 5’4) after telling her she was no “Pamela Anderson” herself I went to see my 3rd gyno. She listens, doesn’t make me feel crazy. she tries to help me but I’m still not getting what I think I need.
I spoke with 2 GP’s both female, who didn’t want to put me on HRT, they wanted to give me anti depressants! I requested HRT to help with symptoms…was just given what was available due to national shortages!! Initially I was put on Femostan (mylan) but near the end of each packet cycle, my symptoms have became so bad, I can hardly control myself, feel like I’m going mad, cry at almost everything, hot flushes, insomnia, want to hide, anxiety, leave my husband, no sexual appetite, brain fog, angry, I don’t trust the decisions i’m making etc etc On top of that, it all occurs around my period and the moon being either new or full, maybe I am therefore mad!!!
I have contacted my GP again, as feel I needed help, requested trying another
HRT, wanted me again to have antidepressants, but have declined and just started Evorel Sequi patches – time will tell if they help, though I am now thinking maybe I should have antidepressants because of how sad and negative I am. My facial muscles have forgotten how to smile…
What bothers me is a 10 minute consultation is all it takes to define if patients should be given HRT or antidepressants and a national shortage then means you even if it’s HRT it’s just what’s left on the shelf….
I find it hard to ask for help but I’m shouting for help now, anybody listening…
I hear you and can relate. I just discovered all this today and am appalled that my docs never thought about peri menopause when I went to them with my anxiety and panic attacks that just suddenly started on the job in November, at age 49.
I will be contacting my GYN soon to see if she can test me and offer suggestions for help. I have not heard of the medications you mentioned, but definitely think you should keep trying other remedies or find a new doc.
Hang in there-give yourself grace each day-acknowledge what you are feeling as being valid. I have discovered that the sudden onset of anxiety, extreme sadness and emotional outbursts, negative hatred towards the injustices of the world…all hit hard and they are very real to me, but not everyone else understands-including those closest to me. I have been trying to remind myself that I am not going crazy.
My Nurse practitioner wanted to give me antidepressants which are not proven to help night sweats. I referred to the NICE guidelines. I asked to see the GP and mentioned this. He got very offhand and said what do you want from us. Next I get a call and sudden suggestion to resume HRT. I am appalled how many women are treated so poorly in this day and age for a very common condition. It’s the lack of knowledge that makes me annoyed and the easy option of prescribing medication that is not appropriate. Lazy healthcare service in my opinion.
Unsympathetic as I had not reached 12 months without a period
After 2wks of playing phone tag w my doc, I finally spoke w him Monday and he prescribed me clonidine. It’s only day 3 and I’ve only noticed a reduction in the amount of hot flashes (I was having 30-40 a day ??) , but they’re not completely gone.
I’m going to give it a wk n see if it works or not
I spoke to a doctor to discuss if I was in peri menopause and to ask about headaches. He looked bored as if to say, just get on with it for god’s sake.
I have had to go back on HRT as I couldn’t cope daily life and work after stopping HRT. Doctor would not prescribe- sent me to hospital, got checked, then after 3 months had a lump under my arm not related. hospital dr wrote to gp advising to stop. then I had to call and explain. she wrote another letter to GP who doesn’t really know me well. would not even allow me to book telephone call to talk and explain.
I was in my late 30s but the doctors keeps telling me it to early
It’s so sad to think dr does not realize it can start earlier for some people, we are all so unique ?
Extremely unhelpful and didn’t think it was a big deal… just grin and bear it, it won’t last forever!
Just fob you off especially when you have more than one symptom
Doctor doesn’t really care much. Even when I explain how I felt during my menopause, all they’re saying is have red clover. I have bad hot flushes, foggy head, anxiety attacks. And many more symptoms. I’m just giving up going to doctor cuz they don’t care a bit.
I can understand your frustrations, you are not alone,, try not to stress ,, just know there are people who care??
Mostly adequate but I did my research before going to them so that really helped as I didn’t want to be fobbed off
I’m a POF case that started at age 14. I’m now 39, having been in postmenopause for 24 years. Doctors barely know how to treat normal cases as it is. I had one of the best menopause doctors in the US for years and she didn’t know what to do with me. I’ve lost all hope.
My doctor makes me feel like I lab rat , lack of sympathy,, unnecessary tests, very disappointed, gave me estrogen made from hoses urine ( Premarin) .
Premarin is useless. Demand bio identical hormones. Change doctors if you need to. Be armed with knowledge. There are several good books that I have come across that make me feel I am not alone in experiencing all the perimenopausal symptoms and enduring useless advice from doctors.
2 years ago at 45, my gyno told me I was too young to be peri. 1 year ago she told me anxiety wasn’t a symptom. This year, after a trip to the ER, she now says I’m peri ONLY because of my age. I’m now going to an endocrinologist for testing and to help manage all my symptoms.
My experience has been terrible you tell them your symptoms and then they just set you up for unnecessary invasive tests.. cystoscopy, stress tests , and medication with no explanation. I am 52 And I have had no bone density test done or blood work done to see where my vitamin and hormone levels are… frustrated with the lack of support and compassion. ?
Female GP’s being very reluctant to prescribe HRT despite symptoms of peri-menopause
My doctor did hormone tests and swears there is nothing wrong. I live with this every day and I know something is not right.
I’ve got the same problem. Got the test results and they say I’m fine, no perimenopause. I definitely feel like I am on a daily basis.
I wish doctors would listen to us and understand when we say we know something is different about our bodies and we have concerns and worries and we need support. Not just be dismissed as a head case.
Been for numerous blood test appointments because I feel menopausal symptoms. Spookily enough I’m not menopausal because my bloods come back normal EVERY time! ?
My experience of doctors has been universally appalling. I’m 49 and each doctor has diminished or trivialised every symptom. I saw a doctor this week who is the surgery hormone quack. She will prescribe but not advise. So, if you know what you want she will write a script for you – but no advice, no reassurance, nothing. Actually quite sinister in a way. The experience was very much ‘at your own risk’
Just completely dismissed my symptoms
Said you’re too young- this was a female doc
Hi everyone- brand new here, and SO glad I’ve downloaded the app. I’ve been reading and reading… and can actually feel my breathing slow as I do!!! I’m not alone…!! How wonderful this feels.
I suffer diagnosed C-PTSD which has been exacerbated by this whole menopause lark… and recently immigrated, too. All been a bit stressful…
Three months ago I finally saw a doctor here… and his response to my trying to explain how I feel? “I hope you’re not going to be a difficult patient?!.. I don’t do mental”
I was floored!!!
Still haven’t come back from that… can’t believe a doctor would go that far. I’m reluctant to even try and find another doc.. on top of trying to deal with finding my feet in a new country and dealing with seismic anxiety and memo, I just don’t have the energy to go through the motions of sifting through doctors to find one who actually cares…
I can’t get over this! How utterly rude and unprofessional! I would consider reporting this individual to their professional licensing board. So sorry to hear you were treated that way, along with everybody else writing on this board.
Good or not good is too binary of an answer. What if a doctor is good on some things and not others
I was 45 when I started having peri menopausal symptoms. My GP said I was too young to be going through this change and suggested antidepressants. I took them for 12 months with no improvement. After around 18 months I decided to go back and speak to another GP who was sympathetic. After I had a good chat with her and told her all of my many symptoms, she agreed. It took a few months of reading and research but I finally decided to take HRT. It is helping me in some ways. The plus side is that I’ve had no side effects/adverse reactions using them. I’m now nearly 50 snd still on the patches.
I heard that GPS get half a day training on menopause (or maybe that’s used to)?
Three years ago I was diagnosed with GERD and a sliding HH, soon after I’m told I’m in perimenopausal I changed my diet but fell off the wagon, this year I’m told I now have gastritis! I’m my own Dr now, I’m starting to think my gut issues are due to perimeno but NOT ONE dr has given me any clue or educate me on it, and I’ve spent lots of it already! I’m so pissed!!!! All the Google searching drives me crazy!!
I got lucky and was referred by another woman to NP Deborah Nicholas at Kaiser Permanente in Richmond, CA. She seriously saved me! I was recently widowed and had spent the past year + dealing with my late spouse’s caregiving – he died at 51 from prostate cancer and was paralyzed the last 6 months of his life.
As early as 36 my journey began. Because of how I look they would my book without peeking inside!! Since then, many cities our family has lived and they are all the same. Making insensitive hurtful statements such as “I shouldn’t be too concerned because I Look good” or “People are having surgery to look like this” although I battle depression. Endometriosis, dermoid cyst. Mental breakdown in front their very eyes. It has really traumatized me, lack of giving knowledge on their part and The dismay for me that I am as Knowledgeable as I am about this and about myself and My Body! Be Your Biggest Advocate! Sending Love and Light to you All
I spoke with my GP over the phone but I wanted a face to face he just wanted to put me on anti depressants without even seeing me, which I refused. I finally got a face to face appointment where he prescribed patches. When I started taking my second pack I got severe pain in my breasts. They took me off this an prescribed gel pump pack, (one pump and two tabs at night for 12/28days. This didn’t work so they increased the pump dosage and was told as I’m refusing anti depressants I may have to put up with night sweats/hot flushes or painful breasts. Not really ideal to have either tbh
I’m fearing being fobbed off when I call them. All of a sudden I’ve got heavy legs that are painful as well as joints & muscle tension & the weight is piling on making the symptoms worse. My legs feel so lethargic. Any pointers when I call them? Thanks
I can talk to my gynecologist and primary care doctor
Doctors I’ve dealt with including the obgyn dr who delivered my daughter and did my tubial ligation surgery and found the non cancerous cells on my cervix won’t really do anything to find out why after my surgery and hormones replacement therapy when I was trying to transition and had to stop taking testosterone after I got a cyst on my ovaries and they claimed it was caused by the testosterone injections but I had really high estrogen levels which was taken by the doctor doing the hrt for me so she tested my hormones levels my regular doctor should test my hormone levels for himself I’ve been dealing with menopause symptoms since I was 24 years old after my tubes were tied and before that I was having extremely heavy and painful periods the surgery was supposed to help what they claimed was just a painful period
I mentioned it to my GP, who is an older man, an older married man, mind you, and he brushed it off. He started talking about his wife’s hot flashes. Hot flashes are not the only symptom. Perimenopause apparently has many symptoms. I just happen to have panic attacks around the time of my period some months and they have been bad this month. Some months I just don’t feel right, or I cry for no reason. Those times though, I’m able to remind myself that it’s almost time for my period and I’ll be ok in a few days. Panic attacks can be persistent though. My doctor just wanted to throw a pill at me and send me on my way. That’s all any of them do. He did do an EKG on me though to reassure me that my heart was fine. I need to find an older female gynecologist. Maybe she’ll take me seriously and check my hormones. My primary doctor wouldn’t do it, saying the blood tests for hormones can be “tricky”.
I’m 55 years old and still in regular periods. My PCP still asks if I get regular periods and my answer has been yes every time. Everybody I know has already been through menopause.
Thanks to this app I at least know what to expect and what can help.
My doctor is 10 years younger than me. She really doesn’t know how to help me other than prescribe anti depressants. It’s like menopause is not covered in medical school.
Doesn’t listen at all
Horrible Experience!
I tried explaining what I have been experiencing and was told (before I even finished speaking) “get a fan if you feel hot.” I tried explaining the heart palpitations, extreme brain fog and confusion moments, and really bad anxiety and moments of sadness/depression (I’ve never had in my entire life) and was told maybe I need a psychiatrist and they walked out of the room! I went to this doc because she was a woman! And this was my experience!
I’ve had a diagnosis of ADHD for over 20 years. I’m now 44. Two years ago I felt like my brain was breaking — I couldn’t find the right words for concepts/things and I felt like my cognition was declining. I took a neuropsychological test that showed my cognition hadn’t, in fact, changed since my last exam 10 years prior, but the neurologist never mentioned how hormonal changes could affect ADHD symptoms! I am very disappointed in the lack of patient education regarding how hormonal changes affect women, in general, but specifically regarding how they affect ADHD brains. Do the doctors just not know? And all my care has taken place in Boston, which has excellent medical care!
My symptoms have continued to be disregarded by my GYN. After asking a third time for absolutely ANY solution to help make sex less painful and navigate the depression and overwhelming various symptoms that I experienced, I was told “you’ll need to lower your expectations for life going forward”. It is absolutely unbelievable to me that 1. A Dr would respond that way 2. When a symptom is depression, the answer is to basically say “yep, no hope. It will only get worse”. It is heartbreaking. I have researched endlessly and have found several different approaches that work for me. It is a lot to take on, it is lonely, it is depressing, overwhelming. Trying to maintain my same performance levels at work is difficult with brain fog and memory lapses. I truly hope that this becomes more mainstream, communicated, and supported.
I will say: for anyone struggling with sex, I discovered an absolute miracle that has worked for me. It is expensive and I know many may not be able or willing to spend $400+, but the feeling of finally making positive progress and feeling like a partner again is worth every penny. The device is Joylux for anyone also looking for an avenue to try.
I hope everyone here feels supported and has hope- to stumble into this and feel so in the dark for something that affects half of the population is truly so shocking to me.
I had to go see a menopause specialist
I went to my General Dr about my drastic weight loss, pains, and my period issues. Each time I left disappointed, until my friend told me to go to my OB. My own General Dr did not refer me to my OB. When i asked my General if it was Perimenopause she said no, that Periods usually grow less not more. I started my cycle using small tampons, I ended it using Super ( I didn’t even know Super existed). And my Dr has the audacity to tell me it is not Menopause related!!!! Oh yea, plus i have Fibros!
I have had so many doctors who fight me on what I want. How do I find a doctor who will prescribe topical HRT cream and accept my Blue California insurance? My PPO doctor says she can’t prescribe compound cream HRT but I am allergic to whatever is in the estrogen patch.
Taking any and all suggestions. Between the cold air for my hot flashes, the cold air is doing a number on my bones. Is there anything I can do?